Sunday, May 29, 2011

The Right Stuff

... Do you have the right stuff? Take a good look at yourself and let's see if you have what it takes to be a genuine Emergency Medical Paramedic Supervisor.

Based on my observations these are the qualities that every EMS Supervisor worth his breakfast burritos has:

  • A drivers license- c'mon you do have a drivers license don't ya? Hey- we'll work with you...
  • The ability to seamlessly flip between Facebook and videos of firetrucks on YouTube- and a superhuman reflex to get something that looks like work on the screen if you get an office visitor
  • You gotta be a delagator- the more of your work you can push off on others the more time you can spend in the drive thru at Mickie D's
  • Breakfast Burritos- you knew we'd come back to them- minimum three a day or don't apply. Same with the 44oz. Slurpee or Big Gulp or whatever they sell in your town. Three a day or don't waste our time
  • Physical fitness- if you are currently fit and trim, I would suggest bulking up a bit. Your belly should hang well over your belt and cause you to waddle when taking one of your hourly trips down the hall to ruin the shitter
  • You a good listener? You must have the ability to misinterpret and misquote every thing you hear
  • Do like meetings? Because you'll be going to a lot of meetings. But don't worry- there's always food and nobody expects you to have any input. In fact, at most meetings nobody wants you to talk at all. Just say- "Hi- is dem doughnuts I see over there? 'kay Bye"
  • Are you willing to work the grueling EMS supervisor schedule. You didn't think you were going to work that cushy 60 hour a week paramedic schedule did you? Expect to work five weekday eights- and like it.
  • Do you have the ability to become invisible when things go wrong? And pop up like a delicious toaster pastry when the going is good?
Well, does that sound like you paramedic? You just may be on your way to a career as an EMS Supervisor. Good luck.

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